Saturday, July 31, 2010

I'm glad to have clarified a few things with one of my friends.  She felt used by me because I really only seriously talked to her regarding Kelly (first for help deciding whether I should go out with her, and secondly to help get over her).  Now I think we have gotten off on the right foot as friends as I am starting to let go of talking about Kelly so I can start to live my own life and build my own friendships independent of her.  It feels freeing.  It really made my day today, in addition to doing an awesome lab presentation, and going apple-picking at an orchard, drinking apple cider, eating apple donuts, and in general acting like a little kid and playing on the swings + going to the petting zoo that was at the orchard.

Another step to making memories that are my own, and being the Dan that I aspire to be.

Life is so real to me now.  I more present than I ever have, so in the moment, not aloof of off on Cloud 9.  I saw this beautiful butterfly today that almost landed on me, and it reminded me of a time I was at 6 Flags Great America waiting in line for the Viper, and a butterfly landed right over my heart and sprung off and flew away into the distance.  I am learning to enjoy just the everyday things of life: the smell and feel of clean clothes and the fulfillment of a self-cooked meal shared with friends, a morning run before the world wakes up...  I no longer think I need to have all these epic adventures all the time to keep my sanity and my identity.  Life consists of these small moments that take up most of our time, so why not start appreciating them as more than just a necessary waste of time?

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